BrainDump

Survived 3december Austin and new projects

2009-12-07T01:18:00.003-06:00

While this years Austin 3December event was a little smaller turnout the actual event was amazing. Like last year I was responsible for getting the speakers lined up, scheduling and Emceeing the live event (we ended on time so that was good). All the presenters did a fantastic job and the audience participation was really up, lots of good questions.

Also we had great prizes to give away from Autodesk like Mudbox and sketchbook pro. Mixamo a new company in the mocap space has some really cool web based Human Ik retargeting tool for retargeting their moves on to your skeleton...they gave away 5 free moves for download. Rigging Dojo(my new company) gave away a free rigging review/critique session as well as a copy of the Animator toolkit for Motionbuilder.

In case you don't know there is a very active Autodesk user group in Austin, the AAUGA http://3daustin.org/ and we meet the last Wednesday of every month. So bring a friend, spread the word and get active in your local community.

With that out of the way, the other big news (you might have read on other sites by now) is

I have decided to co-found a new online education project especially for character artists wanting to learn more about character setup, scripting etc... with two great guys, Chad Moore and Josh Carey.

http://www.riggingdojo.com/

You can find out more at the site, so I won't bore you with that. (We are still in beta but it looks like we are on track for our first full class early next year.)

I did want to talk a bit about how this all happened. First was that last few years two of my friends and I separately were all talking but not with each other about having a really hard time finding good character technical artists and talk of training and mentoring and schools came up...well I said "hey I we are all talking about this separately, lets join forces" and then here we are.

And to be fair, as we were working on the details a few things happened. One some other amazingly talented people had the same idea and http://www.td-college.com/ was born and kind of kicked the wind out of us for a bit. After talking it over we re focused on what our original goal was; Wanting help fix the disconnect happening for people that read the rigging books and post questions on forums and watching all the video training but were still struggling, and create a place for them to get real guidance and production based training no matter what their experience level. The other issue was the huge number of people needing help learning MotionBuilder and dealing with pipeline and character rigging issues that adding motion capture to your workflow brings.

So if your a reader of the Inspired rigging books or have watched all the amazing Jason Schleifer masterclasses or your working in production all ready but want to learn more or are in school learning modeling and want to see it ready to be brought to life (yes we are a bit like DR. Frankenstein) or are struggling with motion capture and MotionBuilder, then come over to the Rigging Dojo site and see if it is right for you and let us know what you think.

Brad

still here-looking in, hunkering down

2009-10-26T00:31:00.002-05:00

I am still alive and kicking just buried under all the really fun stuff I have been doing lately and have not had much time to sit and collect my thoughts in to something worth writing.

I could use the "use of facebook and twitter" have taken my will to post here away but that is not really true. The truth is starting a new company and being a stay home parent and supporting both a book and masterclass DVD and finding speakers for the 3d usergroup and testing software and governing /scheduling the austin stay home dads -while trying to find time to practice and have time form my self and with my wife has left me no time to spend on my "personal" side.

Looking forward to finishing up this year strong and the start of a fresh new year in a few months.
Until I have more time.

p.s. happy Halloween, Thanksgiving, "holiday" ho, ho, ho, and New Year, if I don't make it back around here to share before then:)

Attention: As in "HEY YOU DRIVING ON THE ROAD!!! PAY ATTENTION

2009-06-20T17:21:00.003-05:00

Happy Fathers Day to the dads. As a Dad I am very protective of my kids and my family and of my own life, so when I have been nearly run off the road 4 or 5 times in the last few months because of people doing everything but paying attention I get a little , umm, not happy. Thank my mom for asking for guardian angels to look after me every day and my martial arts classes for helping me try to be constantly aware of my surroundings because that is the only reason my car and my family are not accident victims.

So, PAY ATTENTION!!!! to your driving and get off your DAMN cell phone, what ever your texting or talking about or watching instead of driving is 1000% less important than your life and mine.

Also here is a parting tip- the lines on the road, if you can't understand how to follow them while turning or merging and you also can not seem to figure out how to user your turn indicator/blinker LEARN, they are there for a reason.

To Be a Baby � SEEDMAGAZINE.COM

2009-05-06T01:14:00.000-05:00

To Be a Baby � SEEDMAGAZINE.COM

Every day I am amazed at how much my own kids have learned and how they process the world and I think wow
that is amazing, even more so that we all used to be that way... then I find articles like this one and
It all comes together...it makes sense and matches my own intuition about my observations of learning and
understanding in my own kids.

Learning everything new from day one, our brains of course would be functioning on overdrive and in full
observation mode instead of " dumb kid" mode, makes me think even more now that life for "screen facing" kids
are having their time for mental play and exploration shut down, boxed in and programed to only take a certain kind of input...adds,
funny how A.D.D has the same word as ADD, advertising in it.. hmmm, funny and odd.

So I no longer find it strange that a child of 3 weeks old can learn and use 4 ASL (American sign language ) to talk with
their new parents and that they can have choice and free will and are born with a mind of who they are, as Parents and adults
become tour guides and less the "shapers of their minds". We have influence yes but only if we chose to be aware and involved and
allow our own mind to fall back in to a state of Play with our children do we get to live in the world with them.

Kind of slow on here

2009-04-21T23:46:00.001-05:00

Well as the world rushes past I have been swallowed a bit by all the new
and the old and the thousand other things that
have become a distraction, job, obsession, standard part of my day , etc..

Those things would be, twitter,facebook, kids,tukong,teaching workshops,
software updates, family, books, art, dishes, math,
video tranning, IRC #techart, new IM software, chracter rigging,
writing, MotionBuilder support for DVD sales , Book support ,
house projects, classes, it goes on. (oh yeah and a good amount of TV)...

night.

tests and work and things

2009-02-21T22:28:00.004-06:00

Today I tested for my red belt in Tukong Moosul...I passed but as always got nervous and totally froze when doing my sword form!! so I am going to work extra hard the next few weeks to make sure I know the weapon forms with out thinking so I can keep my belt:)

I have at the same time been swamped with work projects and I do enjoy doing scripting and tool creation, I am looking forward to getting back to more artistic endeavors... Like teaching at the ConceptArt.Org workshop in Dallas.

Staying busy with dad group things , I was nominated to be Governor of the group for the year. That should be fun.

***
Happiness is finding Orion's belt with my girl and living the excitement of the stars through fresh eyes.

end of the year wrap up

2008-12-21T10:07:00.002-06:00

Just wanted to post a few things while I had a chance:

Autodesk 3december- This year was the first time I helped organize the event, in years past I have been MC or MC and presenter at the Austin 2008 3December event but this year I got more invovled and it turned out to be a great event. A big thanks to all the guest speakers and the local studios that let their artists come out during the middle of the afternoon, you all made it a great show.
Math- I am starting over and trying to learn to like it instead of fighting it, it is every where, I use it all the time and the man made world we live in would not exist with out it so I am working on it.
Tools- there are a few new websites out there besides all the great Google tools that I am really liking, one of them is the adobe site..http://www.adobe.com/acom/ The screeen sharing tool and meeting rooms along with file storage are great and have been a very powerfull and usefull tool for working with remote artists and programers on all kinds of things. I still really like JING also for quick shareing of videos and images, great for support or comunication of ideas.
If you read one Blog- or two - there are lots of sites that are intresting to read but few offer so much quality content, one is http://www.37signals.com/svn/ , they make great software and they are a very open company based on sharing and they have great posts. The other is http://www.fourhourworkweek.com/blog/ Tim Ferriss blog , for people that are wanting to win the war over personal time and living a life that is full or learning ways to change something about your self , he is a life hacker and the blog is great.

grandmas poem

2008-12-20T15:59:00.000-06:00

We just found this recently tucked away in some old papers of my grandparents. I know she would have liked to share it, I think she would have been a good blogger, she was a fast typist and worked on one of the first super computers in a public service company. Love and miss you.

OUR BRAD
He fills our hearts with so much joy,
This talented loving golden haired boy.
Hard to recall the many memories
Of this "Imp" full of fun and such a tease.
He tries hard, always doing the very best he can.
Has ability to befriend small boys or a grown man.
His accomplishments are versatile, but excels in art.
Mom,dad, grandparents can claim a part
Of paintings drawn by Brad,from the heart.
No need to express how very proud we are
Of this dear young man whose sure to go far.

mind of a child

2008-12-16T00:32:00.003-06:00

So mark this under, a proud moment in a season of giving. My 4 year old heard a story on public radio about the homless shelter running out of blankets and needing more... fast forward to a very cold day and us checking the weather. I say, oh it is going to be cold out today and the response was" DAD! what about the guys that can't get blankets, we should give them some and help them" so today we went and bought 4 sleeping bags and extra blankets and then I drove us down town to the shelter to give them our donation.

This affected both of us but, the child mind more than me, upon seeing all the people lined up outside the shelter waiting for the time they hand out blankets, it triggered an avalanche of questions the whole way home. Talk of why they carry so much stuff, why don't they look up when they walk, why are they sad, standing around, why they don't have a house, where they sleep, how they live, about kids in Africa that don't have any thing, about how lucky and thankfull we were to have a warm place to stay and on and on...how we hoped other people would donate blankets as well so they had enough.

I think it was an incredible act for a child so small to tirgger such an act of giving; even though I did most of the leg work none of it would have happened with out the concern of a child for humans in need. I know todays events will stay with our family for the rest of our lives and both shaped our child's thoughts of the world as it exposed a small glimpse in to a future adult my child would be some day and I am so proud and humbled by the power of thought and its ability to create action.

Be open, willing and selfless , listen to you children because they are listing to life and support and encourage and live by example for they will mirror you and your choices. I can't take credit for who my child is, kids are born who they are, but I will always do my best to support her selfless thoughts and enable them to become actions and I hope if some one reads this that they will find ways to take action for good.

Steel Penny Games : Bruiser and Scratch

2008-11-23T15:08:00.003-06:00

My friends over at Steel Penny Games have their first Wii ware tile out
http://www.steelpennygames.com/index.php/bruiser-a-scratch
Bruiser and Scratch, a very fun puzzler game that I had fun playing and watched as a kid very, very much younger than me!! did amazing at.

So congrats on getting their title done and out the door, I wish them well and I hope people enjoy the game. It makes me very happy to see people strike out on their own and produce a game out side of the EA/UBI SOFT giants, Austin is starting to be the home of several smaller game shops and I am very excited by that.

Websites and things

2008-11-07T01:01:00.002-06:00

First, much like the story of stuff in the last post,

http://www.wisdombook.org/

This wisdome book project is really amazing and such a great idea... check out the link , it is worth it.

Also

in more 3d related things,

The Guerrilla CG Project
www.GuerrillaCG.org

It's a non-profit training initiative called The Guerrilla CG Project, a website dedicated to teaching computer graphics for free with super quality videos.

This site has some amazingly well crafted videos explaing the foundation of the artform of 3d graphics. please support this site and help out or comment or both:)

Read more about it at the cgtalk thread http://forums.cgsociety.org/showthread.php?f=59&t=692611&page=1&pp=20

the story of stuff- wow

2008-09-09T13:15:00.000-05:00

Another Way: "Another Way
Many people who have seen The Story of Stuff have asked what they can do to address the problems identified in the film."

Ok so I am posting this here one because I think the message is a great one and second because it is so well produced and presented.

Parents this starts with not having the goodie bags full of crap that is just filler junk at all the birthday parties, myself included, all of us computer users and well, software designers for that matter
could make software run more efficiently on older systems... over all message is REDUCE and repair and reuse. look at the iphone .. v 2 is worse in lots of ways than v 1.

go read the link and then watch the film:

http://storyofstuff.com/

YouTube - Randy Pausch Last Lecture: Achieving Your Childhood Dreams

2008-08-06T00:46:00.000-05:00

YouTube - Randy Pausch Last Lecture: Achieving Your Childhood Dreams

this is worth watching and it just might open your eyes to life or at least let you view things a bit diffrently.

dad things

2008-07-17T00:03:00.001-05:00

So my latest adventures have been mostly with my new baby and getting used to balancing the time and attention with the first kid-o. Lots of fun some days, hell on others but
that is how things go when every one is tired and crazy from the constant go, go, go being a parent can cause.

Just wanted to say that something that worked very well this time around was agian sign laguage, ASL, even at 3 weeks old, my son was able to sign back for basic things
like change me, daddy, mom, and he is useing 5 or 6 reguarly , sleep/bed being the best because he can tell us when he is tired and wants to lay down..
So learn and practice/use some basic signs with your new babies, they are not as mindless as you might think and it beats the crap out of just endless crying.

Also I have to say that a visit or two to the chiropractor for my older child after each little grothspurt or any time where the kid is just mad and yelling and freaking out
all the time , day after day (not the usual behiavour) then its time to take them to the chiro, and have them adjusted.. it makes life liveable agian and the freakouts/screaming went down
to normal once a day toddler tantrums vs. waking up mad and screaming the whole day. Try it its a good thing.

ok, other than all that baby/kid stuff, I am still manaing ways to have to many things to do related to computer 3d work and some other exciting long term plans are shaping up
so there are lots of fun things going on.

night.

Can You Become a Creature of New Habits? - New York Times

2008-05-11T00:52:00.000-05:00

Can You Become a Creature of New Habits? - New York Times: "“You cannot have innovation,” she adds, “unless you are willing and able to move through the unknown and go from curiosity to wonder.”"

this article is fantastic and helps answer a few things that have been coming up in my head lately. One thing that I have always strived to do was not get in ruts, not to copy but
to be inspired and use other ideas as springboards. I have a hard time creating something new that I think is 100% mine because my brain seems to stop me, I like to work off of and with others and their ideas so that it can grow and become something new.

There are lots of things to think about and learn and more access to information than ever before. Problems with it for me are, I like to learn about lots of things but almost never go deep enough in to those things to make them stick. I need to work on that. The other is that I have a hard time finding others that share that desire and so I some times overwhelm my friends with crazy random links to stuff, that I want to talk about but they never have time to do that... I need to slow down on things and focus more so that information will stick I think, just talking about it has always helped it stick and when I don't it goes away.

djx blog � djSwitchManipOnSelection.mel

2008-04-18T16:48:00.000-05:00

djx blog � djSwitchManipOnSelection.mel

I just saw this post, DJX blog has some nice rigging mel scripts and he created a nice little auto script out of some of my
rigging book code. so stop over and check it out.

Brad

MotionBuilder Master Class is finaly up for sale

2008-04-04T00:38:00.002-05:00

http://motionbuildertraining.blogspot.com/

If you ever wanted to know how to get under the hood and make MotionBuilder work the way you wanted it to then this class is for you.

I am happy we are able to finaly get it up for people to buy because it was a lot of work and effort from Chad and I to make a good class for software that is not easy to learn and has very little in way of advanced training. I hope people find it of use.

some old max rigging stuff:) and thanks

2008-02-02T16:35:00.000-06:00

So since it has been almost for ever since I posted any kind of work that was rough/old/behind the curtains of my past work I figured I would dig out some of my work from Acclaim since they are dead and buried and put up some of it.

The first link is a crazy over complicated expression to create an automated elevator for The Red Star env. Tre Z did the model and I with some math help got it working 99%, with an extra layer for keying the start and end you could just move the elevator shaft and it moved the pulleys, rotated gears and

Crazy Elevator rig

more to come...

(Also thanks to Bungie for having me up to the studio, great team and some sharp character guys and I look forward to consulting for them again. )

MC and presenter for this years Austin 3dec..on the 11th

2007-12-17T21:23:00.000-06:00

Austin 3d Users Group Meeting Nec. 11, 2007 at Edge of Reality

It was a good meeting, with lots of people showing up for free food:) and some other 3d stuff. I showed off some of the masterclass rig from Motionbuilder. It was nice to see some of the other local motionbuilder guys and show off some of what the software can do.

Funny that 3dec ended up being on the 11th but what can you do, its really an alias event that Autodesk lets continue, for how long who knows.

On a side note, the "updated" support site on autodesk.com sucks since its a black box. I don't want to pay for access to a site that I can't see what I am getting for the money... and most of the time the alias support site did not have any thing I needed to pay for but I could at least see if/when I did.

Junction Point Studios and other news and bits

2007-11-18T20:13:00.000-06:00

Junction Point Studios

I have been working part time for the last few months for JPS now Disney Interactive Studios. I am really excited to be part of a Warren Spector project and work with an amazing team of new and new and old friends. I get to help them solve some very complex character rigging and animation related problems (at least for a real-time game characters). I will stop there until the project is announced.

Other news:

Other news- a few people have had job upgrades lately, My friend Josh Carey went to ReelFX his nice scriptas a character rigging supervisor. Hie also put sketchPose script up on highend 3d, check it out if your an animator that likes to use sketch lines to pose your chracter rigs.

Crispin Broadhurst is now useing his motion capture skills at a new studio up in Dallas called Motus Digital (they just got a sweet new vicon mocap system).

And another sign that the world is coming to an end Jorma Aburn , animator and friend extrodinare... has finaly started a blog .

Lastly, Chad Moore and family moved and is working at Turbine being uber tech artist, after leaving Sony in lovely cali.

That is all for now... there are a lot of other things going on but i just wanted to pimp some friends and post something new.

Open Pipeline and other updates

2007-09-10T00:17:00.000-05:00

About | openPipeline

Well First , I am linking to this Maya software called openPipeline for two reasons, one I think its great that there is something like this available to students and home users as well as small studios. There is nothing worse than having a project that has no workflow and this helps people hit the ground running.

Go now and check it out

Other news and the first post brings me to the next parts. I am was free for two days a week starting this month to do some freelance work, The lucky winners of my time:) are

- KingsIsle where I have been helping the art teams with max script / workflow issues.
- (soon)JPS or Junction Point Studios, just bought by Disney, where I will be helping with character creation process and some fun rig/pipeline work
-Also on the side of that I am involved with two very amazing and very different software companies where I hope I can help provide some guidance in my areas of expertise... if I say much more I might get in trouble. It is going to be lots of fun though and when I can I will post more.

-What i spend the rest of the time doing is matching up my friends that need work with studios that need work done... and so far I think I could just spend all my two days doing that since I seem to be doing ok with that, now if it only paid!hehe..

My IM away message needs an update now to say..."Parenting by day, Saving the 3d world two days a week...leave a message thanks" from just saving the 3d world at night:)

Now, I don't think I am really doing so much that I am saving the world, but I do know I work hard to rescue all of my friends and fellow ex-coworkers from wasting time when I can, on work issues or problems in max/maya/motionbuilder.

....
And last, our wonderfully talented friend has her new art show "Wonders"opening in Winter park, September 15-December 30, 2007 at the Cornell Fine Arts Museum.

She is a great artist and is brining awareness to the challenges the ocean faces in our current world state, working to bring art and science together is always a good cause and she has done a great job I think, go check it out and show your support.

night.

Father Son adventure

2007-07-22T15:54:00.000-05:00

Extreme Adventures of Vermont guided outdoor wilderness adventures

http://www.vermontvacation.com/

I am not sure when or where but its time for my Dad and I to
have an adventure for just us that gives us time to be like we were
when it was just him and I out on the ranch when I was little.

This link is just one thought-
Vermont, a chance to see where he grew up and where a large part of my
family lived for a long time.

There are lots of other ideas and things that we could do but here is
my thought for the day on it.

Love you Dad

SIGGRAPH 2007: MasterClasses

2007-06-21T00:28:00.000-05:00

woo our class is up and our little character is so fun looking, now to quit blogging and finish the damn thing.

UPDATE!! DONE and it rocks a eye tearing 80 pages for just the rig section.. animation will consume a good deal as well..

and you have to love our chracter.. hes so wacky..meet Noogle MacDoogle
Designed by Jorma and Skinned by Josh modeled by Chad and rigged by Me, wooo team effort rocks.

night thoughts- observation and "always on Zombies"

2007-05-28T00:39:00.000-05:00

not much to post, back from another trip home to visit family.
I am always amazed at the kinds of people I see at the airport, so much
good sketching to do with them.

It is really sad to see so many people in the airport now infected by
the "always on zombie". You can spot this person by the blinking blue ear infection and or the circled eye-wide open stare at nothing as they talk way to
loud with their hands covering their mouth as they try to conduct biz in public. The other is the infected screen stare, they hold a laptop in one hand while typing franticly with the other while standing in line to board the plane...as they are narrating this event to the ear bud.

Fascinating also to me are the shared travelers... these are the people you see board your plane and fly with you then days later, you see the same people on the same flight back to where you came from. These people could have picked any other day or time to fly but they chose the same days and times as you did and I always want to ask them what they did for the same amount of time I was there doing things.

The world is smaller and smaller and it saddens me that so many of us, myself included are just checked out all the time: Driving,Flying,Walking,Eating, some times Eating while walking or Driving and Zoned out on the phone, oblivious to the world around them or the people with them. Escapism evolved.
If ever there was a horror movie come to life it is driving 70 mph on the road surrounded by SUV driving, hand talking, nacho eating, book reading driver zombies swerving in and out of their lanes like they are the only one on a suffocatingly crowed road.

Observation through sketching is the only way I can help myself unplug and I don't do it nearly enough.

TED | Talks | Janine Benyus: 12 sustainable design ideas from nature (video)

2007-05-15T16:24:00.000-05:00

TED | Talks | Janine Benyus: 12 sustainable design ideas from nature (video)

WOW.. this is so amazing, The site is great and the speakers and the talks are beyond insperational, mind opening/altering ideas that as the site says "worth spreading"

This talk I am directly linking to is one of those that could change the world for the better if only people will chose that path.

take time out of your day.. spend 18 min for a talk a day and be uplifted.

The Red Star - Take 2 Interactive

2007-04-26T15:23:00.000-05:00

The Red Star - Take 2 Interactive

There is a game god and he has allowed the last project I worked on along with all the other talented artists and programmers and designers on the team to be released. Go buy it, enjoy it, its a lot of fun to play and it looks great.

HOOOOOOOOOO RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH I am so happy.

Rock on Team Red Star

p.s. if you want to read how I felt when I found out it would not be published and the old acclaim when in the toliet read here.. my old post about accliam

Bill Plympton Studio

2007-04-14T01:56:00.000-05:00

Bill Plympton Studio

holy crap.. you can watch Bill Plympton!! animate at his desk. Wow that is so great, also check out the time lapses of his past days. People still have to draw this stuff and here is live proof.

why meetings are black holes of productivity!

2007-04-12T01:42:00.000-05:00

TAG Blog: Homage to C. Northcote Parkinson

Damn this is a great post-- here is a quote that stuck out to me..

"An official wants to multiply subordinates, not rivals." Unsurprisingly, when given half a chance, officials do exactly that.

The 4-Hour Workweek,Tim Ferriss and other life changing things for me

2007-04-02T00:12:00.000-05:00

The 4-Hour Workweek and Timothy Ferriss

this guy is my new hero for lots of reasons but damn, he is doing some things right.. same age as I am and while I have a 0 hour work week I know I won't always have that lifestyle. Also his stuff about your not what you do, don't let your work define you as a person and since becoming a full time parent, that has been one of the harder things to deal with. Here is his podcast from sxsw. good listen....

also some one who gives me hope ...and who I wish I knew
is Willwright, his talk at sxsw is great and should be listened to.. here

And while I am at it, this guy Don Miguell Ruiz and his The Four Agreements book ( just digitized the tapes and put them on my mp3 phone to listen to when doing dishes or making dinner) have had a long and lasting and positive change on my life and how I view the world.. and I have fallen out of that a bit lately and in listening to them again I am working on being better in life.

The other life change that I have been able to experiance has been through the Master Yi Tukong martial arts school. Grandmaster Yi has a great life philosophy that he shares with all the students and also makes you work harder and do better than you ever think you can.. The result is that I have been in the best shape of my life for the last 2 years now and a huge part of it is thanks to Tukong. I lost over 30lbs working out two times a week and eating "crap free" food and finally feel like I am in my real body, and not in the body I had that got me the "fat kid" target on my back at school.

As always any of these things are only as good as the work or effort that an individual puts in to them and them selves.. its never easy but it beats the alternatives...(fill in the blanks).

baby loves disco - about

2007-03-18T01:17:00.000-05:00

baby loves disco - about

well its 1am and I am up reading about .... baby loves disco!! and looking at blogs about animation, something has to be wrong with meP:)

baby loves disco sounds like a great chance to both observe some funny shit to animate and have lots of fun

Turn a styrofoam package insert into a make-believe castle: Parent Hacks | Parenting tips

2007-03-18T00:58:00.000-05:00

Turn a styrofoam package insert into a make-believe castle: Parent Hacks | Parenting tips

Well I had to post this cause parent/kid/animator you have to love anything that can be turned in to an instant fortress for your desk full of toys or (room if your a kid). sweet!

good thoughts and things

2007-03-08T22:56:00.000-06:00

Just putting a good thought in to words and putting it out here in to the world....
E, I wish you well and want you stay strong and know your loved no matter what, sending good thoughts your way sis, happy b-day.

the Ted Zone

2007-01-17T21:11:00.000-06:00

So my friend and ex-coworker Lance Myers has a new short up that is quite fun and for more stuff check out his website over at http://lancefever.com/ for more work from him.. one of my favs is the "Subsidized Fate, nice mix of 2d and 3d. Check him out and then go vote for his film.

mocap and animation

2006-12-18T13:34:00.000-06:00

Mark Mayerson has a few posts about how the animators are loosing ground to motion capture and for once it is writen from a non agressive/attacking stance but from a postion of intrest and of
debate. The sad fact is that even the best cg animated films are weak because of story or insert your own reason here and they have nothing to do with being well animated or not.. I watched some old disney movies recently and the pacing and most of all, character dialog was so much better. Not this constant hip/ pop culture inside joke crap that fills shrek 1-3 and over the hedge etc...

I am all for art being like this but we don't need every single film to be this way.. I for once would like to watch a film that was well crafted entertainment and not just a series of pop- referencing, out of date as soon as it is released , poop humor , big name star filled , wast of money that so often ends up on the big screen and small with the direct to dvd trash that fills the shelf and then the landfill.

So mocap or not, we need better films - here is hoping that pixar now Disney can fix the mess they made of animated films and produce a film that makes people fall in love with animation agian. Mocap is a reality of the industry right now and so is hand animation but very few people in charge of money seem to know when or why you would use one over the other...cause the fact is they both are costly and both require lots of time and effort and most of all need people that are skilled with movement/performance and acting or you end up with a pile of steaming crap on the screen.

happy holidays

2006-12-16T23:36:00.000-06:00

this is just a simple post to say I am so happy that this year is almost over for so many people. I hope that everyone have a bit of peace and hope and love this holiday season.

Here is wishing that 07 is a brighter and happier year than 06.

If every one can just think one non selfish good thought every day for week I think we would have a little better world, and people would notice and then the good thoughts would just happen more and more because people would be happy.

see yall next year ...

The best thing Autodesk did with the

2006-10-17T21:48:00.000-05:00

AREA : Blog Post
Whats this something about 3d and a post about Autodesk..hmm whats changing well I am done with some freelance work so I have time to get back in the mindest of non-kid stuff. Ok so on to the AREA. So Autodesk has opened up the Blogs for every one to read that used to be locked away on the old alias site.. Duncan has some great tips and I really like this one "mayalicous" and linked to one post on his blog about seting transform options. Transforms are one of those things that a TD has to worry about but animators should really not have to think about at all when poseing a chracter, they should be thinking acting, performance, pose, clairty of action...........not thinking.. shit! what world space am I in, oh I need to be in local or object and then this object only rotates.. oh need to switch to rotate ..oh I am in world screwing up rotate curves instead of gimble mode ETC>> the TD should set up a puppet rig to do all this thinking for them so that all the animator does is click a ctrl and pull/rotate scale and just make the pose.

Other news- I went up to Reel Fx
and taught a two day rigging and skinning class for them. What a great trip and great class. I had so much fun seeing old friends and meeting a few new ones. Reel Fx softball team kicks ass and played amazinly well in a very close game. If any other studios want a custom rigging/character setup or artist workflow class taught just let me know.

Trapped in my own goatee!!!

2006-09-15T18:35:00.000-05:00

Ok , wow it has been a long time blog.. hello again, been busy and working and raising my kid. So to the meat of this post, I have had a goatee for a long time and every so often I shave it off. My wife then misses it and I grow it back, cut it, grow back no big deal.. over and over.
Ah so now we have a little kid and I shaved my goatee today while they watched me shave it, "shave more, shave more" so I shaved it clean off and got my face all nice and smooth.

Cut to a few min. later as we sit to play blocks.... " beard back on, put it on, back on!!!" I say I can't its gone, start the tears, the crying/screaming and running to hide behind the curtain for the next hour. Good grief.. Wife gets home, we sit to eat dinner and my kid starts shaking and crying again, "Daddy leave, daddy go, go , leave dad" says my 20 something month oldish kid. So now I went from hugs/kisses and loved to being a terror to my own child and being banished from any room my kid is in so they don't start shakin and crying.... Note to the world, change= bad in the world of kids and even worse when that change makes you look different to them!

My wife says, guess we just like you better with the goatee, great.. forever trapped in my own facial hair. Some day my kid will love me again I hope.. or my hair will grow back in in a few days. Either way when you are the fulltime caretaker/parent it makes it hard when your kid breaks out in tears and can't look at you when you have to change the diapers or try and feed them. Good times. Talk to you soon blog.

p.s. something animation related.. umm.. way to many movies still being created that all look the freaking same with the same kind of characters and the same look and feel and the stories all kind of merge in to one long forgettable mess. Cars was good, long but looked great and was a nice change of pace from some of the other films out. Over the hedge, really funny in a slapstick kind of way and looked great in that "CGI almost cardoon real" kind of way that gets kind of generic after a while but still a fun film. Lots of other CGI cartoon look-a-likes coming out but I will see them.. then forget them just as fast..
On the front of pissing of all the people that are all touchy about "pure" keyframe animation, Mocap and capturing true performance have taken huge leaps in the last year. Monster house finely almost got it right with the non-photoreal CGI characters making it at least watchable compared to polarespresscreepy. Also the golum/kong toping acting that the main bad pirates in the Pirates of the Caribean number 2, was just amazing , so amazing that several of my very smart CGI animator friends could not believe that the pirate bad guys were CGI the entire time. ILM did an amazing job and pushed the art and use of mocap to a whole new level mixing the best of real world acting , mapping it to a computer character and then adding animation ontop of it to make a character with all the acting and feeling of a real person with a squid face.

not much to post but I felt I should post anyway

2006-03-14T22:28:00.000-06:00

Well lets see, not much new to talk about or any thing art related to talk about or complain about.
I think the big part of this is that because I don't have the energy to spend on it has a lot to do with it. I am still being creative and finding new ways to express my self...pictures, drawing,
when I can and cooking and just finding ways to relive my childhood alongside my little one-, I have even steped back in to geek mode in order to do some max script for a friend of mine that just had to move to MS in seatle to work in a game there. I don't understand how any game teams in this day and age don't have dedicated tech artist to do that kind of work and also help interface the programers...that is the games biz for you, just Fuc$ed up with no sign of change in the near future. I really don't have any dirve or desire to ever go back to work in games, I miss film work-miss NZ, weta friends, sony friends etc.. I am so happy to still be lucky enough to spend time every day with my kid and my wife and live life with out all the extra meaning less self induced kaos of the work place.

On other topics.. I have ot say that I am amazed at how good HiDef content can look and at the same time think...how and why have we waited this long to have every one converted over to digital and produce more shows in HD? At the same time I am really tired of all the new tech wars over HD dvd! I still am trying to get my current tapes over to DVD and now a format war and new changes for Blue Ray and HdDvd, what ever- it sucks cause not all movies are going to be on both formats and every thing is going to be bit $$$ and in the end do I really care if they are that much better? I am watching DVDs upconverted to my tv now and they look amazing, as good as they can and better than what I have seen in the theater lately with their craptastic projectors and bad sound and scratched up film. Even when I saw Narnia in digital it looked all screwd up,because some how they did not project it correctly or at half brightness or someting..it looked bad@ So no rush to have yet another format to deal with in life.

Ok its late, I am sick and need some sleep since I have been getting up way to early to chase the kid around all day.

happy holidays

2005-12-28T00:05:00.000-06:00

its a temp post right now,more a placeholder for me to come back to soon.

It was an amazing christmas this year, my baby's first that she could really understand and be excited about..saying ho ho ho every time the word Santa was said. My family-Dad and his wife K and her daughter E- came to Austin this year to celebrate with us. Our first christmas as a new family.

there are lots of funny things and good stories of cooking, walking and baby crazyness that I will want to fill in later when I am not sick and tired but I wanted to start the post so I would have to finish it later.

I love my Dad and I am so proud of him for stoping smokeing!! That is so huge for some one and he has been doing great, its alot of work for him to not smoke. So my family gets here to town and is going to check in to their hotel and then I don't hear from him for a little bit, then finaly he calls and says they have a problem with their room and have to move hotels>@ what ok, so I drive down to meet them and it turns out that the stupid hotel is letting people smoke in the non-smoking rooms because the smokeing rooms are underconstruction. Well for a ex-smoker to stay in a room that smells like smoke is just not going to work and any non-smoker its not so great either. After way to much work we finaly get them checked in to a hotel just a min or two form our house and it turned out to be much better to have them so close since it can be a production to get two seperate familys of 3 going some days:)
So yay, its almost Christmas and I am so happy and relaxed and excited to see my Dad and new step-mom and sister. That first day we ran out to dinner at Chez Zee and every one had great food and it was a very nice ending to a crazy long day for every one.
Friday my Dad came over early and I cooked him breakfast and I just had so much fun sitting with him and my baby girl and just hanging out in the morning. K and E both slept in at the hotel and then were going shoping so we kind of just hung out with my dad the first half of the day, while this was lots of fun I wanted to see and spend time with the girls also but they had not gotten to spend much time with each other so they went to the mall.
They finaly got here to the house about 2 and we all packed up in my truck and drove down town to the new Whole foods world HQ-yes it really is so cool its a tourist destination:)- and we had a great time walking around and shoping in downtown austin. It was also the last night for trail of lights and it was getting late, we were planing on getting their early but had left our coats and needed to get our baby girl (1) dinner so we drive the half hour home, eat, and packup and drive back down town or try... we get to the exit for zilker park where the lights are and are stuck in a line of cars for abou 25 more min.. only to finlay get close to the park entrance and be turned away by the cops(thanks for telling people 60 cars back that the parking is full) and so we drive downtown to the parking garage where busses are running to the park...ok so the line does not look so bad, we pay for parking and run up to the line-only to see that the line we saw from the parking lot was only for each buss, the line to get tickets to the bus was goofy long, like hundreds of people long, so long that you could not see the end untill you get to the end.. and we walked for ever to get to the end of the line or start of the line I should say. Lucky for us the line went fast and we got on the bus, got the park, walked-talked-looked-had fun-had cider-and finaly got to the big giant Light Tree at the park that every one stands in the middle of and spins, spins alone or with a friend or a big group of friends, as you look up and you spin the whole tree spirals and you get dizzy and stumble and every one has a great time. Well you do untill some one is just standing in the center of the tree talking on their cell phone!@@@@ My wife and sister were spinning and runs in to a lady that is on a phone just standing there. She got all pissed off and was like " Oh my golly I just got slamed in to, my shoulder oww" so I am standing there with my baby in my arms and see her start saying this and yelling at Jen and I just go off... "Look lady, sorry it was an accident but give me a break, your on your cell phone just standing in the way, get out of the way next time, people come to spin under the tree, that is what they do they spin and run in to each other. Sorry you got run in to but shutup and get out of the way" at this point she is yealling at me but as a description to the person on the phone....her husband trys to get her to move and calm down and by this point my cowboy dad is ready to jumpin and kick some ass if needed but really there is nothing that gets me more steeming mad than some one acting like they are on some other personal planet when they are on a cell phone in the middle of a giant gathering of people and then acting like you killed their dog when something happens to pull them back from their planet. Well if you go to a place where every one is spinning around you and you stop and decide to act like your standing in your kitchen talking to your buddy on the phone, don't be supprised when some one bumps in to you, you crazy gooftarded cellphone planet head. So that ended the fun a bit and we got back in another giant line to get on the bus to go home. Finaly home we all parted ways, got the kid to bed and my family went to the hotel and all of us tried to get rest for the next day when were were suposed to figure out how to make Tamales!
Christmas eve day, tamale day and time to start the weekend of cooking and hanging out at home with my family. The best part of this vacation with my family so far has been getting to just be a DAD and a Son at the same time and also a Brother and Husband. Its kind of strange to be so many roles/titles all at once and I think the Husband tag was the one to suffer the most since I some times did not pay enough attention to my wonderfull wife. I love my Brother title because I love my sister, I think she is an amazing girl and once she got to know us and opened up to be her self more I loved her more, she has this great beautiful laugh that I got to hear and we talked about things like what kind of movies we liked and just got to be closer and it was really nice. The really nice thing about her as well is that E is amazing with my baby girl, they took to each other right away and it was just such a cute thing to see, my baby for one never sits still for any one and on the day of tamales- they both sat and played on the couch for what seemed like an hour and my daughter was having so much fun. E just knew how to play with her and let my daughter play the way she wanted to and it was such a wonderfull break for me to know some one else besides my wife and I could just hang out with her and she would like it. I do wish family lived closer for a few reasons -for my daughter to get more time with her pappy and new grandma and aunt, for me- to get more time to just relax and get to know my new family better and also just to get closer to my dad...I see this story is getting a bit off track from where I started but I think its kind of strange to get a new family and then not have to live with them or spend weekends with them like I did with my old step fam and I am missing not having that time to know them but that is how it goes. I have to just feel happy that I had such a strong conection and feeling of love for them from the frist time I met them that I don't need all the extra time to get close to them since I am there all ready? The time I spent with my sister this past several days, the more I am convinced that we were always connected in the universe and just did not know where that feeling was going untill we both met for the first time..at least for me it felt that way. I have had this happen in my life before but it felt diffrent when I first knew I was in love with my wife....I can not describe it right, some day I will find or learn the words I need-gahhh,stupid lack of mastery of the english language:)
Anway back to the day of tamales, lots of masa, meat, hot suce and a huge table of bowls and corn husks and mess, it was a huge amout of work but fun and worth the experaince of doing once... ours turned out very well and we all ate untill we were stuffed that night, we also watched "The Christmas Story" since my sister never saw it and Jenn and I watch it every year as part of the holiday tradition (thanks tbs and 24 hours of christmas story) and its always funny.
Later I could not sleep cause I was excited about getting up and opening gifts!!! weeee I love christmas morning but had to sleep...well a bit I seemed to be getting sick or haveing horible alergies..suck!

I almost forgot, to start the fact that Santa comes and eats cokies and drinks milk(egg nog in this case) we-wife/baby/me- set out cookies and egg nog on the fireplace and after we put the kid to bed.. jingle-bell rattle, raindeer landing on the roof (my fingers thumping the wall) and my best deep HOOO HOOO HOOO Merry Christmas and more bells ----yeah she belives in santa now.
Christmas morning she woke up and we open her door and my wife askes her, do you know who came last night for Christmas? and with exciment and jumping up and down in her crib our girl says.. ho ho ho ho. I think it worked and where she expected to still see cookies where wraped gifts for her from santa.
Christmas was a great day, lots of gifts and fun and sillyness and just wraping paper everywhere. My dad filming on his camcorder, me filming on my camcorder, digital cameras going off, cell phone cameras going off it was well documented fun that is for sure.
We all took naps after all the excitemnet of opening gifts and just relaxed the rest of the day while waiting for pots of food to cook/ cornedbeef cababge and potatoes.

The next three days were really nice. We all just hung out and got to have some relaxed fun, shoping and eating and playing with my kid and just having a real good vacation minus the being sick part (both K and I were not doing so well and causing every one else to not sleep much).
One thing I realized that was diffrent about being around my dad was that because of our talk last time I was home(see my other post ) there was a calm or just a happy feeling being around him. In the past I had the same feeling but on top of it were feelings of him not being happy, of me not being happy with him and just an overall quiet sadness that was between us both, that was all gone now and it was wonderfull. The funny thing is that my baby girl has been a bit shy around other guys the past month and so was kind of afraid of my dad, but by the end she had warmed up to him and on the last day they were here she was playing with him and giving him kisses and hopefully the next time she sees him she will be over her fears.
The other thing my dad had been wanting to do while he was here was get to go eat some good texas catfish and down home cooking he has not had in AZ..well I think I made my Dads trip when I took every one to Hoovers Fire and Ice House where he got to have fried catfish and fried okra and it was all really really good food:) To finish off the day after christmas we shopped a bit and then for dinner we had Amy's Icecream and my Dad and the rest of the family just had a look of joy and icecream high smiles... what a day.

I miss them all and I know my baby is missing the constant attention and her new fun aunt who let her take all the makup out of her purse or play with her cell phone to keep her happy:)
I am so blessed that I have such a large family in my life.. blood related or friends or through my wife and her family... every one is amazing and gets along and likes each other and that is rare these days. I love them all
Happy Holidays and a wonderfull New Year- looking forward to 2006

AZlandscape2005

2005-11-28T00:40:00.000-06:00

AZlandscape2005
Originally uploaded by bclark.

painting inspired by the cover of an az highways mag. First real paint and brush art work I have done in over 10 years.

I had a bit of time to dig out my art suplies and bought some new brushes and did a painting over a few days while my kid was naping:) Never felt so good to do a painting.

not much new

2005-11-03T18:15:00.000-06:00

Just have not had much new to post on.. lots of things going on but mostly with my kid..learning to walk,talk,eat etc..

I am still working on my photo skills and started doing a painting wich has been fun but made me realise how much I missed real media..the feel of a bush on paper is great and I missed it so I am looking forward to keep doing a few small paintings to keep my creative sprit growing.

Other news I have been really enjoying Tukong martal arts latey, my body has been doing what I want most of the time and it has never been more fit. I feel great and really like the variaty of forms,kicks, weapons and other bits of zen and sparing thown in. Master Yi is great.

Ok.. baby is up got to go.

Flickr: Explore interesting photos from 26th of July 2005

2005-08-31T17:00:00.000-05:00

Flickr: Explore interesting photos from 26th of July 2005

I know my birthday has passed and it is well in to aug. but you can check out the most intresting photos (not sure who picked them) for
july 26 of this year on flicker..

the more I snoop around on flickr the more I like it as an idea and as a photo network, amazing how many people are taking pictures and how many of them are really well done.

anyway check it out.

Flickr: Photos from bclark

2005-08-30T17:14:00.000-05:00

Flickr: Photos from bclark

well I finaly put pics up on flicker because i wanted a site I could post pics to that would let me link them to other sites...really more places I can take up room on the web is good for me:) we pictures

Reading Your Baby's Mind - Newsweek Society - MSNBC.com

2005-08-08T21:36:00.000-05:00

Reading Your Baby's Mind - Newsweek Society - MSNBC.com

Well this was an intresting article but really not mind blowing, I think
because my wife and I are observant people we catch alot of things
going on with our baby and her attemps to comunicate. I can imagine though that there are lots of parents that just don't or won't or can not
watch/listen/guess what is going on with their child and think that the kid just is crying for no reason and that its out to get them instead of
working very hard to comunicate to them. Being a baby is not alot diffrnet than just beeing droped off naked in the middle of a forgin land and left to fend hopeing some nice village takes you in. Now you have all kinds of needs that have to be met but no idea what language is being spoken and they have no idea what the sounds comeing form you mean. You are then left with emotions that every one knows, happy,sad, anger, excited, scared etc.. and then what ever else you are able to slowly learn while with these people.

Maybe its the animator in me that lets me watch and understand what a small little gesture my young baby is doing over and over means that they want to get up or that face and noise they make every time they are still hungry but distracted and just need a break before going to eat agian... I feel like it has been fairly easy to understand what my baby is trying to say more often than not and I often forget that we don't or can't just sit and talk to each other.

As adults we all could work on being better listeners, to be actively involved in reading the body cues and actualy hear what the other person is trying to say and its no diffrent when it comes to talking or listen to kids. Be active and engaged when your with them, if they are 4 weeks or 15 years it does not matter, they need to be listened to and both of you will be better for it.

happy birthday

2005-08-02T12:25:00.000-05:00

Well I am a year older and just had my 10 year High School Reunion and my dad got re-married the same weekend
for a second time. Talk about one set of emotional highs and lows and every thing in-between all jammed in to
a few days. For the first time ever I did not care I was getting older or even having a birth day, since the birth of
my baby I just want to do and get things for her- oh its my birthday, ok, what do I want for gifts nothing really for me, I did not want anything that I knew of since I felt that I had the best gift in my wife and baby. Little did I know I was going
to get one of the best gifts in my life, one that I did not know how much I needed and wanted.
Well on to the trip, I see my mom and she and Bella play and have a great time. It was good to see her and since she was going to have to baby-sit her on sat, all the better that they were having so much fun. After hanging out with her we left
to go over to my Dads house and meet for the first time Karla and Elizabeth, my dads new wife/step mom for me and my new
step sister, they would meet my wife and baby and all at the same time they are franticly trying to get everything ready for
the service and receptions (family and then for all the people that work for my dad).

I have been dreading this for months, I did not want to like Karla or even see my dad really or any of my family. See my dad had been with a person for along time that I did not like and after years of dealing with her I had grown to accept her but never felt for one second that I was ever going to be anything other than just my dads son. She had kids and I liked them and got along fine but it never felt like there was more there, fine that is ok or I had thought so. Well when my dad finally left her and the true ugliness of her showed and I was so happy for my dad to be free of her, he was calling me more and said he would come and be here for the birth of my baby. Wow! I felt like I had my dad back for just me, and I would get to see him more and talk with him, I had missed him and I did not know how much.....then he tells me about Karla and her daughter and how happy he is and I can see that he is happy, truly happy like I had not seen in a long time. I was happy for him and then I thought about it and was really mad, I had just gotten him back and now he is finding a new family again to be with, a new kid he has to take care of and they get his attention and love and get to be with him and I go back to not really having him again.

Fast forward to now, We show up at the house and see my dad, he is so excited to see us and he looks great! I still have not met Karla or Elizabeth yet as they were out but I knew was going to not like them, I was wanting to just hate them for taking my dad from me but I could not do it. You have to understand that my dad had smoked and drank for years and was drinking more and more and I was worried for him but he was the one that had to change himself no one could do it for him. Well he did change after he started seeing Karla again-for her he wanted to change he quit drinking, quit smoking and is feeling so good his gray hair is turning brown again he is getting younger-well I guess I will be nice to this woman since she is making my dad so happy. Then in more moves of niceness that make me really just not be able to dislike her if I had tried , she put her dog in boarding so that we would not have to worry about the dog and our baby! Oh my god how nice and considerate, who is this lady and how is she so nice? She and her daughter get home and are so excited to see us and meet us and with in a few hours of meting and talking with them and having dinner with them it was all I could to not to just shout and yell that I love them. I think in life there are people you meet that you have known before, that your heart all ready has a place waiting for them to fill when you see them again- I have felt this way with my wife Jennifer and with my baby and a few close friends and when I let my self be open to Karla and Elizabeth they just fit in to place in my heart, like they had been missing and were found and I was so happy to have them in my life, not a step mom or step sister but a second mother and a true sister. I do love them and they are family. This trip is turning out ok and I soften and feel good to be home and the stress and weight lift off of me..

Friday is reunion time and a causal bbq at our high school-I got to see so many people that I did not expect to see and at the same time the ones that I knew were going to be there and I had wanted to see, I did not realize how much I had missed them.
The group of people I spent time with the most and for a better part of 3 years lived with when working with them behind the scenes at play after play at the theatre, were all there. Our teacher even showed up because she missed us as well and it was so great to see every one and meet their wife/kids/etc. My body felt 17 again, the feeling and reactions going on inside me was not describable but it was fantastic. My wife and baby got to meet these people that I had talked about allot over the last 8 years and it was a trip to see my old friends and my wife and baby all in the same place. I saw girls that I had crushes on and girls was good friends with and then I looked back at my wife and thought how lucky I was that she and I had found each other because she was like 3 or 4 of those girls I liked all in one person, smart, sexy, pretty, creative,nice,caring and my friend. The guys that I had been friends with have all done well and to see the people you like succeed in life makes you feel good, validating that good people do good things even though when your in the middle of school you feel like your on the outside, looked down upon if your creative or smart or different than the group around you-something that once you get out of school is celebrated and allows you to grow and shape your life instead of having to feel like you are just a sheep following along with every one else.

How amazing a turnaround this trip was! It started off being something I did not want to do, no not just did not want to do but dreaded going to do. If I could have just stayed home and hid from the world I would have. How sad and disappointing that would have been knowing what I know now.

Saturday was my dads wedding and reception, Karla and Dad had all ready been married but today was for the family and friends and done in a church. I was his best man and Elizabeth was Karla's best woman:) I cried more than any one during the ceremony when Karla told my dad that she had always loved him and never stopped loving him since they had first met when they were younger (18/19) and I lost it, just started crying and could barley stop. I knew right then that this was real and it was ok that I love them and that they loved my dad. It is so hard to be a child and see your parent re-marry because of some many things but this time it felt right and I was so happy and full of love for my dad. He needed this, he needed them both in his life and I was starting to understand why but I did not know how much until later that weekend.
The rest of the day was full of eating and hanging out with family and having fun, then that night we left Bella with
her grandma and went to the HS reunion dinner where more people had come that did not make it to the BBQ. It was such a
different experience than I was expecting but all in a good way. Later that night we picked up our baby and went back to my
dads house, Dad and Karla did not get home until late and we stayed up talking about their second party for the day- an event that could easily talk up a few pages of description on its own.

Sunday we woke up early and went to the fine arts building at my high school where all of us guys from tech theatre met up with their families and our teacher and friend Mrs. Moran let us in to look around our old stomping ground. The smell of the
art room and seeing all of us in that place again just opened the flood gate of old memories and feelings of being there
day after day and night after night working on sets or lights or shirts:) the smile just would not leave my face. The funniest
thing was that there were still posters and artwork and little bits of stuff we had all put up on the walls in the
lighting and sound booth that were still there,10 years later! How anything at a HS lasts 10 years with out kids
changing it or just wrecking it blows my mind but there it was- further making me feel like I had just traveled back in time but I got to bring my wife and baby with me and let them share in the experience. I am so thankful and grateful to Moran and her class for keeping us out of trouble and giving us a safe place to grow and live and experience something wonderful.
Really Great teachers never get enough credit or money or respect but they should. If there was some way to give back to her
the same things she gave to us, to me I would do it; I try to make sure that she knows how much she affected my life for the
good and show her respect by doing well in my life and art career, I hope its enough and if I could I would do more.

Sunday started great and got better and better, Happy Birthday ` week/weekend to me! Jenn and Bella and I got to have lunch with Dad and Karla. Getting to know her better was great, its nice to talk with some one who you feel like you have always known because its easy and effortless to just talk openly and with out a feeling like your having to pretend to be someone else.
The more I learn from her and dad about each of them the more I respect and like and love them. My new family! a real family one that was always there but just now shows up. I was an only child and Elizabeth was an only child and I know how hard that can be and how great it can be, how lonely and how freeing...but if I ever were to have had a sister I would want her to be Elizabeth. I know she has to still get to know me and I don't know how she feels about everything but I hope she would feel the same way about me. I did not know it until I met her but she had a space all ready in my heart that she fit
perfectly in to. I felt like I could be myself and she would like me, the same with Karla.

So Sunday went by and the trip that was so dreaded turned in to a great trip that was going to be to short. I was still
feeling sad about losing my dad though and because Karla and Elizabeth were so great it almost made it worse because I thought well dad will really want to spend time with them and I don't get to be apart of that. That night we were all getting ready for bed and had been up talking and having a great time playing with Bella and just enjoying getting to be all together. Right before Karla went to bed she and Jenn and I were talking and she was telling us how much my dad loved me and how much he missed me and had talked about me and how proud he was of me and I just started crying. I knew this but did not understand why my dad could tell every one else but would not tell me...well Jenn tells Karla that I was the one that Dad need to tell this to and she just took me in to my dad and said you two need to talk! God in one instant my life was changing because of this amazing woman. I was in tears and just looked at my dad and told him what I had needed to say for a long time
and we talked and things that both of us felt but would not or could not say got said. I finally had my father back not just a dad but my father that I needed and loved and missed. So many things inside me changed that night. All of it could have been different had we gone to bed a second earlier or if Karla would have said something else than what she said! I can not thank her and Elizabeth enough for not only the love they have for my father but for letting him come back to me. The best present I have ever gotten for my birthday was to get my dad back. I knew then that they were not going to take him and his love away from me but they were making it stronger and allowing him to love and live again and they wanted and were making it
possible for him to be my real father and dad again. The one that I did not know I was missing, that I did not know I needed until that night. It allowed me to be ok with myself and proud of myself and best of all freed me to allow myself to start
being the father to my daughter that I needed/wanted/can be with out so much of the fear I had before.

That is how life is so amazing and how a weekend that I was scared to face turned out to be the weekend that
would grow and change my life for ever.

Everyday Matters: July 2005 Archives

2005-07-22T22:27:00.000-05:00

Everyday Matters: July 2005 Archives

wow.. read this and live better through art.

Something cool from Walt Disney -makes me feel better about being a dad instead

2005-07-18T23:04:00.000-05:00

Check it -Dig it this was just posted on one of my fav. blogs to read.

Do It for the Children

"Think beyond your lifetime if you want to accomplish something truly worthwhile."
- Walt Disney

Just read (in Pat Williams' book "How to be More Like Walt") about a present that Walt gave to Art Linkletter for his birthday one year.

It's a pic of a small boy looking off into the distance with the word "Priorities" underneath it. Walt wrote under it: "A hundred years from now it will not matter what is in your bank account, or what kind of car you drive. It will only matter that you made a difference in the life of a child."

Sounds like one of those motivational mission statements they sell in the mall, but this one's cooler - it's from Walt!

Industry Giants 2005

2005-07-11T19:07:00.000-05:00

Industry Giants 2005

Well I spent last weekend up in Dallas being a huge animation nerd... I left my baby girl and my wife alone for two days while I listned to these cool people talk about and show off animation. It was great I got to take my best friend Jorma up with me and hang out a good deal with him, something I almost never get to do any more since we don't work together. Also I got to see a few people that I had not seen in a long time so that is always nice.

It was a great time and a huge thanks to the shortguys for puting this thing together every year.

now for a bit of a rant.. Austin is not that far from Dallas, 3.5 hours driving and events like this usualy only happen in LA so if anything like this happens anywhere in texas I want to be there. Network, learn and have a good time. My friend Mike tried to get a huge group of animators and artists from austin to go up to Dallas,FOR FREE! they just had to make time one day off or come up on SAT. FOR FREE, even had a hotel discount... and yet out of the 40 or so people that were like"dude I am in" none of them came all of them found somthing else to do. Now How Lame could "COOL AUSTIN" be!I mean if as a comunity of animators in austin we do nothing to contribute or grow or even just show up to support the cause what does that say about our city to cool animator types that might want to leave LA for a nice er place to live but still have a thriving comunity.. well I tell you what they will end up in freaking DALLAS and not Austin thats for sure. Austin used to be the SHIT! game studios all over the place, hi-tech was booming, film and gameing industries were looking to Austin as the next place to be-then boom bubble bursts, game studios go under and while there are still game studios left here you would not know it.
Maya and Max 3d usergroups are non-existant and when they do happen guess what, people don't show up. Our profesonial 3d comunity here in Austin SUCKS at doing anything postive for the comunity. Dallas has a 3d Feature Film going on, Austin non (Scaner Darkly is 2d computer animation so that is close), Dallas has more than 3 studios doing animation for tv, film and dvd, Austin-well we have at least 3 but you would never know it. The Animation Farm is the only studio that could grow to do it if the right project was there. There is lots of talk about austin and no one in their right mind wants to leave here but it takes creative people being active in the

I just want to see Austin be the "IT" city for creative people to want to come here agian and not be sucked off to Dallas but it takes peoples time and effort and if they can not even manage to make it to a free event that was all setup for them then I don't have much hope for the future of Austin Animation.

Stay at Home Dad or lucky guy or WTF

2005-06-20T16:35:00.000-05:00

Fortune 500 did a story on stay at home husbands and other men that give up full time or part time work to have a family and support their wifes. I have to say that it is kind of strange and hard for people to understand why/how a person can do that and the comments and the missed opertunites are hard to deal with at times but so far I think its worth it. I look at all the other people that wish the could be in the place to even have the chance to decide, stay home or keep working and I feel very very luck I could get to that point in my young life.

here is a funny quote but true from the article..
"
The problem is, these guys are stepping into no man's land. Literally. The sorority of soccer moms can be every bit as formidable and exclusionary as the good ol' boys network at work. "I never get invited over to coffee," says Sueltz. "Forget about it. It isn't going to happen." The men get funny looks at Safeway at 10 a.m. Their presence is a disconnect at the PTA. At the playground they hear lots of unsolicited advice. Robert Fitts, the archaeologist, recalls one mother admonishing him because his son wasn't wearing a sweater. "Some of it is truly good-natured, and some of it is very snippy," he says. It has an undercurrent of "Who do you think you are?... You don't belong here." One at-home man finally figured out why his male neighbors treated him with such suspicion. "They thought I was going to steal their wives," he says."

Or for a ranch view... men are treated as a fox in the hen house. I worry about this later on, with a little baby its not so big of a deal.

THE RED STAR -rock on

2005-04-22T22:18:00.000-05:00

Holy hell.. check it.. ok the game that I was very proud to have worked on and was pissed off when AccLAIM went belly up! Any way if you have a mod xbox and can find the game, its been put up for download and hear is one of the best quotes on this thread..makes me happy that at least some people are getting to play it and who knows maybe it will be the best game never release that you get to play:)
........
........

"getting back on topic, I just spent some time playing this game, and I really like it.

The biggest problem early on is that it lacks any real challenge, but later on it picks up and becomes pretty intense.

"The combat is terrific and there's a nice variety of enemies... Most of the stages are really quite beautiful also..
I love the part where you have a top-down perspective, and there's a large battleship flying overhead, dropping missles on you, and the only way you can see them to avoid them is by looking into the reflection of the ice you're walking on..

The bosses are all loads of fun.. This is easily the best game i've ever pirated without having the option to purchase.

and yes, the similarities between this and Cannon Spike are there, sort of, but this is a much better game, IMO."

HAHAH to cool

My Book-first review

2005-04-06T14:18:00.000-05:00

First Mini Review for my book "Inspired 3d Advanced Rigging and Deformations"

I hope all the reivews are like this one, cause this one made me all giddy and funny feeling inside,
wee reviews... I say that now untill a bad one happens then we will see how it goes:)

My baby book is released out in to the wild...with just a jacket to keep it warm and protect it from the wild coffe cups, sweaty hands and the dreaded nerd drool.

stupid computers and such

2005-03-29T07:45:00.000-06:00

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, fu$king computers and their lame ass MS os, nothing like re-installing a networkcard driver to cause it to never agian see the network@@@!!! huh, how does that happen.. no problem ok just uninstall and reinstall the network card.. works great as long as its only computer to computer..

DIE ALL OF THEM..(this was not on my laptop though.. it rocks:)

Happy Easter- Reinstall your os pelase, thanks!!

Also I got this rocking new hardrive call netDisk, usb portable and also works across my lan as a fileserver, it came with some free backup and restore software...score! well lucky I had it cause my computer went to poop... back up , all good, restore from the backup image.. hmm why will it not let me.. holy hell, I have to buy the upgrade of the software, lucky it does not tell you that any where during install or when your useing it...EQ@$#ETQYERWYQY$#$Q#^&$#& and of course the software just got bought by symantec..oh joy I can have it run as well as norton!HAHAH, it keeps crashing just trying to copy a few gigs of files form the archve back to the harddrive.. fun.

2am working on damn computers... ahhhhhhhhhh had to vent , thanks blog buddie you rock..

And check out pictuer pages.. i am posting more pics over there.

Picture Pages

2005-03-21T18:48:00.000-06:00

Ok, my other blog for pictures only, now up... since its the style of the times to
have multiple blogs or to kill one and start another I figured I should follow along like a sheep..bahbahahhahahaaaaaa bahh baa .. ok any way
http://picpages.blogspot.com/ is up.. I will post images there and not here... but I will leave the ones I did post here up cause I am tha tkind of guy, to lazy to move them over:)

Anyway have a good night blog land,

2005-03-21T17:57:00.000-06:00

Ok, I guess I am going to have to start another blog for pictures cause I want to leave this one for ranting and other forms of expression so I think this here, PODS! will be the last pic I post.. hmm now to create some place new to suck up drive space on the www...muahahah

just testing out google tools/picasa2, hello, and camera

2005-03-15T11:07:00.000-06:00

"chime in"
This is one of the first arty little photos I am happy with, I like all the little bits of crud and age
that you can see on these chimes. I also like that they all kind of look like they are talking to teach other, really nothing else to do but hang around and gossip:)

Book and pictures and news

2005-03-09T17:41:00.000-06:00

Well its been a while since I have updated the old blog, I have been busy... learning how to be a stay at home dad...finishing my computer animation rigging book (the short title is "Inspired 3d Advanced Rigging and Deformations"), that is now for real done! you could even order it from amazon.com and my new wacky obsession is digial cameras and photography. I think its cool that now I get to learn about taking good pictures, not that I have yet and also get to play with them on my computer, digital is great cause you can take so many pics but keeping track of them sucks!!! and then pray you have all your stuff backed up in like 3 places in case one goes bad:) ug

Note on digital cams-- Yeah its a bit crazy but my god its hard to pick a digital camera that works well and has all the cool stuff you want a camera to have (we ended up picking a cannon a85, love it- we first got the sony dcs-p73 and it was amazing if it could take a picture that was not soft and fuzzy...stay away from that camera if you want any kind of detail in your pictures at all)

so there it is all the crazy stuff going on and finaly a small update .. even manganged not to complain about things to much:)

ThinkPad light

2005-01-13T01:16:00.000-06:00

IBM United States

I just had to say that i love my ibm thinkpad laptop light. I know what your thinking.. I though it to, what a silly gimick, a light on the laptop, how usefull is that not!
Well I have to tell you, at 1am, while trying to work on a book with out any lights on because they will wake the new baby that is sitting 3 feet from me, that little thinkpad light is rocking cool. I can see the key board, it acts as a night light when i have to get up and go check on the baby and saves my eyes from hurting...

there are lots of thinks that are great about the ibm thinkpads but I am most gratfull for that silly little light that i use almost every night. thanks ibm..

new baby

2004-12-06T14:28:00.000-06:00

my god I am a new dad, watch out world. My baby girl and my Wife are the two most amazing people I know after going through all the experiances of child birth.

Persistence of Vision

2004-10-27T12:50:00.000-05:00

yes another animator blog but man these are gold and I would have become a pirate as a kid to get gold like this.GOLD I tell you..

And he links to other animator blogs. Sweet links of gold...I mean information.

p.s. The Incredibles are going to be out on nov 5.th and I can not wait! oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.. weeeeeeeeeeeee haaaaaaaaaaa I love it.. and the new Iron Giant special edition is going to be out soon as well!

seward street- art of traditional diseny character animation

2004-10-21T20:18:00.000-05:00

I like finding other blogs about animation and so to link to one that has some good stuff on it like this one I have no problem doing:)

Amazon.com: Books: Inspired 3D Advanced Rigging and Deformations

2004-10-10T21:34:00.001-05:00

ok well I guess this is getting more real now.. we have our names on amazon as well as a book description- now if we can only get it done! weeeeeeeeeeee, fewww its getting there though.

...just an update the book has its own blog now
http://inspired3dadvancedrigging.blogspot.com/
with links to book files and also updated content and tips from the authors.

Brad Clark

big kids and robots and protoculture addicts

2004-09-27T23:35:00.000-05:00

ROBOTECH.COM - The Official Robotech Web Site!

Well over the last week as I see my wife and our baby getting bigger in her ... I the only child as a kid is regressing back to my 10 year old state of mind.. I long for days where I could just sit in my bed reading books for weeks at a time cause it was to hot out to play, ride bikes with the other kids untill it was 1am when we were all so tired we had to pass out, yes our parents were long asleep. And in this need for my self to be a kid agian before I step head long in to parenthood, before I can cross that line the kid in me fought back and it has appeard in the form of robotech.. I have bought all the new remastered dvds that are out.. looked over the website, looked back at my art of book, spent the other friday night shotgunning about 10 episodes one after the other untill 4am when my eyes were about to bleed and by god it was great. I even found the 3 new books in the robotech series on amazon and put them on a wish list because I had spent years find all the first 18 books that had an amazing story built around the cartoon dialouge and then 7 years ago 3 new books came out that add and fill in the gaps of the 3 seperate sections of the stories.. I have become a protoculture addict agian and am instanaly a kid agian for the few breif moments that I can escape in to that world.

Its really strange that as I am now at a point in my life that I have to be the most responsible and most together all my inner self wants to do is sleep like a growing kid, play read and watch cartoons..It seems wrong but I am powerless agianst it.

Random Logline Generator - Story/Scene ideas

2004-09-05T16:56:00.000-05:00

Random Logline Generator - Story/Scene ideas

I found this intresting because I am always in search for ways to generate ideas
and ways to tap in to that creative sub-thought that always floats just out side of most peoples grasp..

it came from this thread at cgchar
http://cgchar.toonstruck.com/forum/index.php?act=ST&f=2&t=2413&hl=&s=8e8da89fb8d4719bb1ac10723ff46332

and from an animator who created his own system on his website

http://www.justinanimator.com/brainstorm.php

check it out..

later,
brad

ToonHub - Animation Links and Information

2004-08-29T18:11:00.000-05:00

ToonHub - Animation Links and Information

my god, more animation links than you could browse in a life time.
looks like an amazing site for any thing you wanted to know about animation.

acclaim.com > welcome!

2004-08-29T14:10:00.000-05:00

acclaim.com > welcome!

Well its a sad weekend for my old work buddies and friends. Acclaim is no longer, the doors are locked, assets have been snatched up by GMAC and so many people out of work because of a few
large assJacks up in NY drove the compnay right in to the freaking moutian side.
I have not even worked there for two months, I saw this coming and jumped to safe ground but it still makes me so sad for everyone.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SUCKKKK, two years of my life along with the rest of The Red Star team have a finished game sitting there ready to be pressed to disk and put on the store shelf.. I hope that an EA or some on like that will just by it and publish it and market the hell out of it because its a good game, one of the best non sports games Acclaim has done in a long time. That and I want those assJacks to see how to sell a product so they get their noses rubbed in it like some kind of cat or dog that crapped on the carpet.. bad executive, bad executive, no more shiting on the games industry for you!

They should take NBA JAM and re-release it since no one knew it was out there either,

ahh fu@K it.. I feel better, still room for some kind of wacky change of events so who knows.

Siggraph

2004-08-15T22:09:00.000-05:00

Flickr: Photos from siggraph

Here are some photos from this 04 Siggy.
Feww glad to be home and still wish it was all going on still..strange feelings to have I guess. I have to give it to my friends this year old and new made this an amazing week... my last big bash before buckeling down on my character rigging book and then a new dad right after that.

I was on constant overload with all the people that I wanted to see, that I did see, that I wanted to meet and who I did meet...
Starting on Sunday with Alias and Kaydara joining forces (can not be more excited about this, rock on guys) and the Alias user group after party was great. Saw old friends and made some new ones and that to me is the best part of going to shows like this.

Any way I am still so overloaded from all the amazing artists and techies that I got to talk with this year its all a blur.. that and the Alias Master Classes, The Thompson Dinner for its authors.........I got to meet Michael Isner (http://www.isner.com/) for like two seconds and I think I made an ass of my self.. but its ok cause he is an uber smart guy behind alot of the XSI character tools.

And the master class presenters and Alias staff that made tues. night unforgetable.. well draging your friend in to his bathroom to puke for like 3 hours while John and I feed him water slower than he could keep it down is something I want to forget, but some how I am thankfull that there are no pictures of the thee of us, Joe, John and I singing Margaritavile at the Karakoe machine as we swayed and tried to remain standing....... few.. I should stop now.. the hangover is coming back just thinking about it.

Thanks to every one old and new that made this an great SIGGRAPH and most importantly thank you Jenn, my amazing wife for letting me go and be a giant hyper-nerd for a week while she was here at home. Love you.

MichaelBarrier.com -- Exploring the World of Animated Films and Comic Art

2004-07-27T14:26:00.000-05:00

MichaelBarrier.com -- Exploring the World of Animated Films and Comic Art

yes well the world needs more blogs and more animation and here is one that is a blog that talks about animation and its from the guy who wrote an amazing book called Hollywood Cartoons, its thick and has very few pictures.. amazing I have the patientice (fu@#4 spelling) to even read any thing with more than 5 words and a big picture these days... later

p.s. I am now a year older and my amazing wife threw a suprise party for me, I never get supprised and she got me so good last night, I just stood infront of all my friends looking stupidly at them...thinking "what the hell are all you people doing here thats strange".. then they all yelled happy birtday or something, there was yelling any way and it was for me..

HAPPY B-Day to ME!!!!

Brad Clark -- Digital Artist

2004-07-22T21:53:00.000-05:00

Brad Clark -- Digital Artist
Well with a uber amount of help from my amazing wife my website is finaly updated.
No artwork up there but my resume is finaly updated from back in 2001...yeah well over due to get that updated.. shesh..
And I guess since I am linking to my home page from my blog you as my readers ( who am I kidding.. there are like no readers of this silly site) have more info on my and my doings.

good night blog..

Daddy Types, the weblog for new dads

2004-06-16T11:19:00.000-05:00

Daddy Types, the weblog for new dads

a blog for the DADs. and yes I am lazy to send the link home to my self so I will just blog it for me.. blogs of blogs of blogs..

CGCHAR -> Carlos Baena

2004-06-15T21:37:00.000-05:00

CGCHAR -> Carlos Baena

ok so I just have to say that the fact that the amount of info free to the public
on animation and comptuer graphics is amazing. I wish it was like this when I was like
10 or 15 years younger.. ug god I am not even old and I feel old saying that

Any way check that link out. Pixar in the House people.

-p.s- two days untill I am out of work. I have never just quit a job like this before and its
freaking me out a bit but I am now looking more forward to this than I have thought posible.

and We heard our kid kicking and moving and its heart beat 160! every one thinks its a girl and
I think I would like that a lot but still don't want to get to over excited untill i see real proof.

Alias Education

2004-06-06T11:03:00.000-05:00

Alias Education

Well I guess this is real now.. .I am on the Alias website.
SIGGRAPH here I come wooooooooo hoooo.

irational fear # 1 - having to talk about stuff to people that are better than you and have
them all get up and walk out of the room.

that and some how having major data loss right before the show,
lots and lots of backups.

If it can happen to Keith Lango when he had triple backup plans how to one up that and survive.

FREEEE

2004-06-05T02:22:00.000-05:00

Well I have gone and done it. I up and quit my job! Ahhh much better.
I was so burned out and just tired of being there working, my life was wasting away.
Now I don't have a job to go to and at this point quiting with no job was a better choice for my
life right now than staying where I was. It sucks because I like the people I work with and I will
miss that but all my hard work and time was getting me no where I felt.
But don't let me fool you, for you see I have more work to do now that I can find time in the day to do.
I have overloaded my self with all kinds of fun and wacky things like writing a book on character setup and rigging..advanced versions of this stuff which I am comeing to find out is damn hard to write about. So then I go and get my self involved in teaching two classes at the big nerd confrence called SIGGRAPH wich takes a lot of prep and will be scrutinized (spelling?) by all kinds of industry pros..ug hope I don't fall on my face.

ah well right one more thing I have a 4 day confrence to work at and present at in like two weeks..I know I will
do fine but damn lot to get ready for come this thing and I am a bit behind on all my life tasks.

Well all but one, the best one taking care of my wife and future child and getting my self ready for that... the
biggest job I can think of, LORD OF THE RINGS was rough 100 hour weeks lots of presure but this is going to be a baby, my baby that I have to protect,love,nurture,give all I can to make it the best kid it can be and still try and find time not to loose my self or my wife and my selfs relation ship. I still want us to be us and then us and the kid but I don't want it to become a set of two souls lost to a little tiny tiny child......... ohh man this is going to be hard, amazing but hard. Yeah makes the book and classes and conferences seem well tiny and easy( i say that now as its 2:37 am so who knows what the hell I am talking about, I thin that same thing when I re read my posts on here..like ug who let me have a keyboard and access to the web, lucky for me there are not laws to stop me from having kids or spewing mis-spelled run on sentences in to cyber space..every word,letter,dot taking up bytes of data, slowy chewing away at the fabric of the web..like what if this last word was the end of the space avalible to me..and blink it all ceased to be real. nope guess it was ok.. back to it your life then.

Syntax Errors--a 3d Comic Strip

2004-05-25T23:36:00.000-05:00

Syntax Errors--a 3d Comic Strip

ok this is not a rant more of a hey look at this crazy comic.
animation related because he uses maya software to make 3d characters that go in this small strip.

The lengths that people will go to in order to not have to draw is
amazing!

heyBaby Train

2004-05-21T16:13:00.000-05:00

Baby Train

Well my wife finaly did it. She is now bloging away with the rest of us:)

It's Shanntastic!

2004-05-18T14:41:00.000-05:00

It's Shanntastic!

What more can I say than its shanntastic.
.. well I could say more but I will not:)

I know what your thinking.. it woudl be bad the more I could say but who is to say that it would be bad..not you cause you don't know what I would say:)

2004-05-14T21:29:00.000-05:00

our little baby

DAAAAAAAAAADAAA

2004-05-14T21:19:00.000-05:00

blog blog log..og...g..

HELLL yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!I am going to be a DAD and it rocks.
And freaking big ups to all the other recent or soon to be recent papas in the group.

The Incredibles - Trailer - Large

2004-05-13T23:02:00.000-05:00

The Incredibles - Trailer - Large

Hot damn - freaking amazing. I am so excited to see this moive..
Hats of to the Pixar Guys on an amazing job so far.

Ahh p.s. this freaking blog this button on the google tool bar is great.
hmm comments not working..must fix.. obsessed over crazy blog..

wooo hooo new upgrade

2004-05-10T19:36:00.000-05:00

Well now Google has done it agian, new blog features and with the google tool bar
you can do quick posts, jus like this one. sweet...
see this is not just for cranky bitchy animators but happy go lucky techy loving freaks like me.... yeah
ok I might have some kind of diagnosable google condition ..must look in to this.

ahhh blogy

Blogs are Cool Untill

2004-01-07T09:33:00.000-06:00

Yeah so this freaking blog freaked out and fucked up my formating, lost all my links and removed my comment code.
love it,

p.s. did you know google has a built in calculator and dictornary function! google rocks and so does the search inside the book on amazon...

Happy Hoooolidazzzz

2003-12-21T22:36:00.000-06:00

Well its that time of year where people come together to celebrate their holiday of choice, festivus for the rest of us you might say.
This time of year is also when people that might never say a nice word to you go out of their way to say hello or Merry Christmas( yes even if you were not going to celebrate the 'mas or were of some other religion or no religion at all out comes the Merry Christ mas cause every one here has to celebrate the Christ).

I do love the part of Christmas that involves food, family, friends and of course gifts... ah gifts. My whole childhood and now I think my adulthood, if you can call it that, is still lazer beam focused on gifts. Whats in them, can I find out before I am supsosed to, what to get other people, will I get what I wanted, what if I don't get what I wanted, fake "I love this gift".. hehe well I love gifts and thats the best part of the Holidays.

Happy Festivus Every Body!

and a Freakin Happy New Year, may it be better than this one

p.s. ah nothing just did not want to be done with this post, not ranty enough ok, well night.

f*ing day

2003-10-31T01:03:00.000-06:00

I wish that this world was not f*cked up. Some day taking things so personal will go out of my system. I will not punish myself
any more for things that are out of my control, that I feel are wrongs that should be righted, things that are long dead in the past but have a horrible habit of sneaking up on you in the most inopportune times..... Being a not fat but bigger than all the other stick figures kid with split up parents and always being the new kid with constant fear of not being good enough or liked or whatever, can sure make for one shitty self image that is hard to shake.

Then you keep looking for ways to reinforce this feeling, not on purpose but with out your control or knowlage your own brain works to keep you down. I could try to blame this on the bullies or my parents or teachers or bosses but in the end its all just down to me.
My fault, my responibslity, my own self that is to blame for it is I after all that is in here, in this brain and its I who react and take things so personal... I could not define my self as just my self so I looked for something to define me.. who am I where do I belong.

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I think this is why so many people join a church or follow or don't follow a religion. That way they can hide in the safety of the group, who are you I ask.."I am a Christian, a Baptist, a cult following loon:)" but I went the other route. I was scared to define my self, to look in to my own reflection and own up to who I am; I became an artist ohhhh yes that's what I am I Am SO HAPPY I FOUND A NAME A TITLE A DEFINING WORD FOR WHO I AM great there are a lot of these artists I WANT TO BE AN ANIMATOR... give life to little characters.
that's amazing, what a great job what a great way of life, what a great word to be. I joined the church of animation. We have a bible, our gods and rituals, we have our own language for life, since we give the illusion of life we can take all the things ever created and yet to be created and claim power over them for we have the power to bend them to our will, smash them, squash them drop anvils on them. Doctors don't even have that much power. Then you go to your job one day and you sit there and you get woken up from your little fake world you have made for yourself and you think WHAT THE FUCK>>>>>> why I am I here , what am I doing and why is it that no matter how hard I think I work and how much good I think I do just one person , just one! can say or do something and cause a hurt and anger and resentment all at the same time, trigger all this emotion for what. no good for me
wasted energy, strength, life from me and is it worth it, in the end they will still be there and I will still be there but I am the only one that is hurting my self, not them.

yeah some day all this will be out of my system, I will have spent many years on this earth and have matured to a zen like state where I am not defined by my work but who I am as a living soul in this vast universe..............
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-who am I-

one more thing IRON GIANT

2003-10-11T21:06:00.000-05:00

the world is going to hell in a hand bag... Warner Bros. has delayed the release of the IRON GIANT special edition dvd untill Brad Birds film with Pixar THE INCREDIBLES comes out... damn it

As long as it comes it some time I will live I guess...

updates

2003-10-11T21:02:00.000-05:00

Well I have updated the lings section... I think we need more websites with the word animation in them!
All good links for any one looking for ways to pass the entire day reading about animation instead of animating.

Also are links to my friends with webpages.. since I have a page that has not been updated in like 3 years I figured I would start this blog since its easy to update and add things like this post your reading now.
Notice the lack of any links to my real web site.. for now any way untill I can get it updated.

night

Stuck inside

2003-10-08T15:11:00.000-05:00

I love all the things that I get to do at work all day.. at the same time I hate all the things that I have to do at work all day
and wish that I was not stuck inside. Cubes, offices what ever they suck and I think that we started off living in caves and having to hunt for food only now to build caves of concrete and not move for 16 hours a day from our little 21" views of the world
soon we will just end up not able to go out side at all even when we get the chance...

even when your free from this stupid litte box and your going home.. boom back inside your bus, car or what ever stuck in traffic
to get home and sit inside only to watch the world through another box.. or if your hip rectangles.. HD plazma 60" views of more real than real tv in case you rold 13" tv with grainy ntsc was to small a view of the world... yes a biger tv will make it better I will feel like I am really there.. ..............................bla bla bla bla

I hate being stuck inside, but I think I hate being outside just as much now.

test is this thing on

2003-10-08T11:06:00.000-05:00

yup I am doing the standard test test... ok so go back to work and quit reading this test..!@#$!@#$
:)